June Photo A Day - Day 2, A Moment

A Moment: A moment when my toddler wanted me to sit on that decorated chair meant for newly wed couple in my sister's wedding.

June Photo A Day - Day 1, B is For..

This month I want to challenge myself for this photo a day challenge:

B is for...Birthday. 1st of June is my daughter's birthday. This year she joined the bandwagon of terrible - terrific two club.

Don't miss the amazed look on her face!!

P.S.: On this day, my Face book status says:

I won't sound clichéd by saying 'Time flies'...with YOU in our life, time moved on to unfold a new phase at every turn. We witnessed the drastic changes in our life with YOU as center of attraction. A carefree DINK couple evolved as sensible parents in these last two years under your supervision. 

Happy Birthday Ishaani (Mishti) ...Stay blessed, Stay healthy, Stay Happy, Stay Safe....Love U Ms.Naughty Chatterbox

Mishti Unplugged - 23 months!!

Fortunately Mishti's fascination with books is still intact and recently she has discovered the fun of scribbling around with pen, pencil, chalk whichever comes handy. Initially I had a hard time explaining her that she is not supposed to write on walls, furniture, bed sheets and all over her body. But, she understood somehow and stopped her drawings on anything other than paper. But, you see the tricky part is not over. She would keep scribbling on books ( mine & her), news paper, any random letter apart from her designated drawing book. 

 I tried explaining her with lots of random reasons to prevent her from doodling on books. I am not sure what actually worked but she has now limited this activity.

One morning she came to me with the book I was reading that time ( Those Pricey Thakur Girls by Anuja Chauhan). I had won this copy in a facebook contest organized by the publishers. She was shouting while rolling her eyes ' Mamma, Kaano Kaano ( she wanted to say 'keno' which means 'why' in Bengali)'. 

I was surprised but then a big smile flashed on my face when I deciphered the reason. Mishti was showing me the first page where the author has given her autograph ( It was an autographed copy sent to the winners of that contest) and was questioning me assuming I had scribbled on that book!!

See, my mother has already found her replica who can assume her authority in her absence!!

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We got her hair shaved for the first time a month back. So, whenever anybody mentions her about her hair, she would promptly reply 'Aannkal', 'Zzzuuuuzzuuuu', 'Toffee', 'Thangtu'!!!

This is actually her shortened version of the whole hair cutting procedure. If you are still not able to make it then let me explain. An Uncle( Aannkal) cut her hair with a machine which made sound -Zzzuuuuzzuuuu. After that she was given 'toffee' by him and she said a sweet Thank You ( Thangtu)!! Now you get it!!

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She tries her best to recite many nursery rhymes but we are able to make out only a word or so. 'Tinkle Tinkle lili starrrr (Twinkle-Twinkle)', ' Baba Bashir ( Baa Baa Black Sheep)' and 'Hunty Dunty ( Humpty-Dumpty)' are the few which we are able to make out a bit but there are lot many which she performs with full action but alas we are not able make anything out of them. So, the best option is applaud loudly after her every pause!! Also, very funnily, she says 'Theek hai - Okay - Bye' after she finishes reciting any rhyme!!

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O = Ohhh -ho!!

O as in Ohhh- ho!! This is the exclamatory word which my 23 months old daughter – Mishti has picked up lately. And yes …. It is me who uses this term often, so my girl has to pick it up.

Ohhh- ho Mishti…you have again spilled water!

Ohhh- ho why have scratched all over your body with this sketch pen!

Ohhh- ho why are you climbing the dining table?

MIshti comes back from Daycare and she starts saying or rather asking for ‘Baba Bashir’. I didn’t get the clue….Has she met some stranger with this name? But, as far as I know nobody in her daycare has this name? It doesn’t even sound like name of any other kid in daycare?  I scratched my head to make out what or whom she wants actually.

By this time, her irritation has reached peak level. She shouted, Ohhh- ho Mamma…..Baba Bashir!!

Me: Mishti, What Baba Bashir dear….Who is he??

Mishti: Ohhh- ho, Ohhh- ho, Ohhh- ho…… Baaaaaabaaaa Bashiiiiir ….peeezze (please).

Me: Baby I am not getting it...What do you want me to do?

Mishti: Ohhh- ho Mamma....Peeezee…Baba Bashir. And she starts crying.

I quickly pick her up and try to divert her attention. After a while when she got distracted and completely forgot about ‘Baba Bashir’!

When hubby came back from work, I told him about this mystery man ‘Baba Bashir’. Even he couldn’t understand what it is! Later in the evening, Mishti sat with her daddy to read her dozens of books. Suddenly, she picked up her rhymes book, opened one particular page and yelled ‘Baba Bashir’. We ran to look at it.

Gosh….she was talking of Baa Baa, Black sheep…that famous rhyme!!!

It happened that although she read this rhyme at home, but that day it was taught to her in daycare. And generally they teach these rhymes with some animated dance & actions. Mishti wanted me to do that when she came back home. But, poor baby, with a mom who was not able to comprehend her language, it was a herculean task for her to make us understand what she want.

Ohhh- ho!!!

B = Book love

Books…..Needless to mention here that I love reading. My love for books started early when I saw both my grandparents always took up reading as their favorite time pass.  I feel myself blessed to spend my childhood under their guidance while surrounded by books. My reading stint traversed in three languages….Hindi, English & Bengali.

Hindi:

 As a child, I guzzled up all the comic books in Hindi with prime characters like Chacha Choudhry, Billoo – Pinki, Nagraj, Super Commando Dhruv, Doga and many more. Apart from comic strips, I also bought occasionally magazines like ‘Champak, Lot-pot & Chandamama. My fascination with these comic strips continued till my early teen years and then I slowed down in reading books in Hindi. Another Hindi teen magazine which I used to read was ‘Suman-Saurabh’.

Bengali:

I learnt to read this language almost overnight when my dad played this trick and refused to buy me my monthly quota of two comic books in Hindi but in Bengali. Yeah…I read few of those comic books in Bengali as well!!. But, now I am really thankful to my dad for that. Without learning to read Bengali, I would have missed some spectacular literary works by awesome writers like SaratChandra, Shirsendu, Sunil Ganguly, Satyajit Ray, Ashapurna Devi, Leela Mazumdar and many more. I loved the ‘Feluda’ series by Satyajit Roy and have read all his books multiple times.

English:

It started with Enid Blyton in my early teen years. I also subscribed to Reader’s Digest from my school library. I loved to read Ruskin Bond a lot and I still do. Then somehow my reading hobby took a backseat which rekindled in last few years. I have managed to read these & these many books in last few months.

I just want to pass on this passion of mine to Mishti and is somehow able to do so.  She has got a bagful of books which she loves to read out aloud in her own gibberish lingo. Books are the only stuff which can capture her attention till longest duration. Check out this one:

Plzz Don't disturb while I am with my books!

A = Abstract

All the other bloggers who have taken up this challenge officially have already reached till ‘E’, and here I have now finally decided to give this blogging challenge a shot, but not officially. Let‘s see, how fairly I am able to be consistent on this task. I hope I am able to catch them up soon.
However, I am not signing up for this challenge officially . I feel I would not be able to craft my posts as per international visitors. Keeping it as a personal challenge now.

So, I have mentioned A as in Abstract ….abstract thoughts, abstract rants, abstract ramblings. Here, I go.

I took a break of almost 20 days from my blog due to lot many reasons. The primary one being that cold, fever & cough had taken refuge in our household for almost 15 days. Mishti was down with severe cold, cough, throat infection along with bouts of fever & vomiting. For continuous two nights she was whimpering and shrieking. We took her to her regular ped who prescribed some anti-allergic & antibiotic medicines. But , pouring three medicines one after another into her system was a herculean task…..SG had to held her tight, And squeezed the medicines through a syringe in her mouth which she spat out while bawling  with her eardrum-piercing shrieks. So, we decided to switch over to homeopathy this time. Although, I have slightly less trust on it than the allopath way, but that time I just wanted any-pathos medicine going down her system which would recover that wailing kid. Homeopathy worked well…and she was up and running within few days.

We decided not to play Holi this year as it would mean wet clothes, water splashing and rubbing off colors with more water which might recall Mishti’s illness again. It was completely okay for me as I hate playing Holi, however SG was visibly upset. So, I gave him a long lecture on parenting sacrifices which tickled his wounds instead of soothing it!!

We also went for a short trip to Allahabad after Holi. Mishti was unexpectedly very social & enjoyed her stint with her both sets of grandparents. Her vocabulary has increased a lot and she had now started joining two words which we noticed in Allahabad. However, she did showed her true colors in the train journey. She pulled curtains of other people’s compartments, spit from the upper berth, pushed us away from the seats, ran through the coach like Usain Bolt, shouted on the top of her voice and even tried rolling on the floor!

But now, I am back to my regular routine…..bit depressed as my job hunt still remains unyielding. I think this post can be wrapped up now as I would keep other topics as fodder for my other posts.

Just now, realized this abstract term is so helpful when you have nothing concrete to blog and can still tap on the keyboard in an abstract way!

                                                                                        

Learning the other language...!!

Almost three languages are spoken simultaneously in our household – English, Bengali & Hindi. But now a day we are trying hard to understand a fourth language which is Mishti’s language. Our little lady is on a mission to increase her vocabulary by manifold by every passing day. She would mimic whatever she hears. But most of the time she comes up with some new word which would refer to that original word. Thus a completely new lingo evolves which we try to comprehend by ‘hit & trial’ method.

As I spend more time with her than hubby, I am able to make out almost 80% of her gibberish. No, I won’t term it as gibberish as she tries her best to talk sense just that the words are in some alien form!!

Few of the typical words Mishti uses and have no link to the original word are:

Gaga – Nope, she is not talking about that shockingly dressed singer but she uses it for drinking water!

Gog – Any other water other than drinking water. I think she started saying ‘Jol’ (bong word for water) as gog and then evolved this gaga.

Boonu – This means button.

Kichin – We first thought it as ‘kitchen’…but later realized that she is referring to ‘chicken’!

Patta – Now this one is easy to guess – Pasta

Fitti – She calls herself Fitti (Mishti)

Pain – Here airplane is referred.

Boonoon - Balloon

Kaapi - ???? I don’t know what it is but she says it a lot and gets irritated when we do not understand.

There are lot many other words like ‘mino’, ‘panzi’ , ‘tabita’ , ‘tima’ which we are not able to decipher till now.

Apart from this she loves to read her books with us and her favorite are the animal & the vegetable book. So within her limits she tries to pronounce them and which results is calling Elephant  as phant, peacock- peepock, crocodile as koki, squirrel as skoowee, horse as show ( and she says taga-taga just after that), monkey as pumkey, capsicum as gumgum, cauliflower as flarr-flarr, cabbage as papage and so on.

She loves her mongi book ( mowgli- jungle book) a lot and pretends to read it loudly for constant 4.86 minutes at a stretch. I got her few panchatantra story books which has bright pictures with one story in a book. Mishti loves these books and make us to read those stories almost 80 times a day.

Another phrase she has picked up from me is : ‘Ehhh ehhh chhi chhi dirty’. So each time we come across any heap of sand, mud, or soil she would loudly parrot this phrase.

She has found this new silly game where we open Google images and she would say any word, I would type it and she would give amused look as soon as various images pops up. So, it goes like this:

Mishti: Dondey dondey (donkey)

I type it. Different pics of donkey flood the screen. Mishti claps vibrantly and says yayyy dondey dondey.

It continues with different words like ‘soap’, ‘shoes’, ‘clock’, ‘lion’, ‘bag’, ‘phone’ or any other words which she is aware of. But this game takes a hilarious turn when SG sits with her. He understands half of what she says and then types those words on pure guess. Result is: Mishti gets more irritated while not able to make her daddy understand what she want -  Daddy keeps on asking ‘Okay tell me what do you want’ – Mishti shrieking more in frustration!!

Everything in this world comes with a price tag...

Everything in this world comes with a price tag!!. Why this sudden realization of materialistic nature of world cropped inside me? This insight actually keeps on popping in my head since my daughter was born.

I am a mom who has to take the charge of the turbulent ship of parenting of a 3 month old alongwith her hands-on spouse who was equally naive about parenting as her.  My mother was there to support me during my delivery and she stayed back for couple of months after that. But prolonging her stay was not a feasible option for her. Following months witnessed a completely different persona of mine. I fretted, got irritated and almost gave up lot many times. I took refuge of Google-dev, got myself enrolled in n-number of parenting forums and fished out internet to amplify my awareness about parenting nuances. My mobile phone bills soared with the long duration calls made to my mother & mother-in-law to discuss the changing color of poop of my daughter. Joining back to work became a distant option for me.

As time passed by, the level of challenges to be a nuclear mommy sky-rocketed.  Activities like taking bath & answering nature calls took record minimal time to get completed. Other household errands took place only when ‘her highness’ doze her beauty sleep. I went green with envy for those ladies who had the presence of elder generation at their home and enjoys the wonderful cushion of support system to handle their kids. Sometimes I also did felt selfish about my change of mindset about nuclear family, a concept which I liked till now.

But, few interaction with one of my neighbor who was incidentally a new mom (her kid is only few months elder to mine) staying in a joint family set up compelled me to review the backdrop of my cribbing. 

Read the complete post in Parentous :) Do share your views with comments.

Children See....Children Do!!

I came across this beautiful video in Facebook which is so thought-provoking. 

A small incident happened few days back established the message conveyed through this video.

I was rushing to drop Mishti to her daycare. The lift of our building was dysfunctional that day. So, I had to carry her through the stairs along with her bags & my purse. All the while she struggled to wriggle out from my hold so that she can run down the stairs on her own. After reaching near the gate, I realized that I forgot my phone at home.
Quite unconsciously, I hissed 'Shit, Shiiiit....'. I was so irritated that I had to climb the stairs carrying Mishti again and it was already late.

The moment it came out of my mouth I realized my mistake. Mishti was looking at me intently! And then she started jumping up and down shouting “Chhit, Chhit”. I felt so ashamed of myself. I distracted her attention to some moving vehicle on road to stop her loud ‘Chhit, Chhit’ but she continued to do so.

I learnt my lesson. These kids pick up our behavior, words & body language so quickly. This is the second instance of this kind; firstone happened when Mishti was bit young. I have to be more careful about it.

Picking up a nice quote from Facebook:

Don’t worry that your children never listen to you, worry that they are always watching you.

Mishti Unplugged - Sleep Saga!

Now days, Mishti is put to sleep by SG every night. Mishti still takes milk in her bottle while sleeping, so bottle of milk is prepared, and after changing her diaper, I sneak out of room while SG takes over.

SG: Sleep, sleep Mishti sleep baby…

Ok you want a song…..Imlee ka boota, berry ka ped, Imlee khatti, Meethe berr…..

Imlee ka boota, berry ka ped, Imlee khatti, Meethe berr….. tan a nana tanan ana a

tan a nana tanan ana a ….khrrrr khrrr (daddy snores!!)

Mishti: Ummm….daddy, daaaaaaaaaaddddddyyyyyyy

SG: hmmmm…yes yes…what… Sleep, sleep Mishti sleep baby…

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Another day:

SG: Sleep, sleep Mishti sleep baby…

I think you get bored with songs, I would tell you a story like mamma.

One upon a time….There was a Papa Bear & a Mamma bear. They were best friends and then they got married. Papa Bear worked in Quality department while Mamma Bear work in their anti department – operations.

I had to intervene here. I barge in the bedroom.

Me: What is this? What kind of story is this?

SG: This is Reality based story!!

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Few days ago, Mishti wakes up 15 minutes before my alarm goes off. Very sweetly she starts waking me…Mamma, Mammaaaaa.

I try to pacify her with one eye open….yeah beta….you play with your books (yeah, few of Mishti’s books are kept at bedside as well!)…Mamma would wake up in a while OKkk.

Mishti didn’t gulp that bait and climbs on my tummy saying ‘Tagataga’ (her version of tug-bug of horse riding). I still choose not to wake up. She gets bored.

All of a sudden, I feel some watery droplets tricking on my cheeks. Quickly opening my eyes, I see that Mishti is trying to jostle her empty milk bottle (she takes milk in her sleep around dawn) in my mouth.

Mammma….Dodo…Aaaaa aaaa Aaaaa!

As if she is imitating her bedtime routine with me by giving me milk & singing a lullaby!!!

Updates Unplugged...!!!

So, here I am back to my normal life. I might have cribbed about its monotonous routine in past but now I realize where my comfort zone lies. Past one month zipped away in my visit to Allahabad to be a part of my sister’s marriage. We came back to Gurgaon with huge baggage of marriage hangover. Although SG says ‘you now have fodder for almost 100 diverse posts in your blog’, I don’t feel like writing even a single word (Blogger’s block!!!!....ehhhh). But as so many changes are floating around in my life , I thought of jotting them down.

• I came back with ailing Mishti who was down with fever, cough & cold. The chest congestion was real bad and gain she has to go through a dose of antibiotics. Doctor advised steam & nasal drops alongwith medicines, both of which next to impossible to be applied on Mishti.
• We had a gala time in the marriage ceremonies. It was whacky tiresome to shop continuously for 10 days prior to that and still missing out few things on the D-day.
• Had a first-hand experience to witness the difference between traditional planning & corporate planning in the event management of the wedding. The generation gap was evident and most of the time it was Me, SG & our cousins Vs or elders ( esp my dad)!
• This wedding reinforced my thought-process about the big fat Indian wedding where money almost flows like water down the drain.
• I managed to get ready on time on the D-day and was first time pretty satisfied with my look. It is not that I am any fashion freak….but I had this desire of looking presentable in my only sister’s marriage. Even SG was looking wow in traditional dhoti-kurta.
• There is a Hindi proverb which says ‘ Sood asal se jyada pyara hota hai’ ( rough translation: The interest amount is more appealing than the principal amount!). Found this line quite true with this Allahabad trip when presence of Mishti diluted much past bitterness and even I received the unexpected wonderful behavior in some relationships.
• Now, as we have planned I am gearing up for my job-hunt. The first step has been covered by hiring a full-time maid from a maid agency. The search for a nice daycare cum playschool is still on.
• My new maid, daycare search & the wedding minutiae demand separate posts so I would soon do that.
• Also, Mishti has added few more words to her vocabulary. This again needs another post….Ahhh poor girl …her mom is so lazy!!!
• Gradually, Mishti is getting back to her normal self. Apart from ill-health she went a psychological change when after being surrounded by so many people all the time she had to be with only two of us here. As SG was not continuously with us there( he went with us came back then again went there before the marriage and came back in 4 days) so Mishti was more clingy to him & she stuck to him as if he might again vanish if she is not in his lap.
• I am yet to write a review of a book from Blogadda and I am almost done with reading that. So expect a book review post soon.
• Also, would like to apologize from my fellow bloggers on whose blog I was regular….I am back and would soon catch up with posts guys!!
• My post was published in parentous.com. Read it here.

So, be prepared for an array of posts in blog. Happy blogging !!

Motherhood: A Song for life

This post is written as a part of initiative by Women's web - The ‘Motherhood: A Song For Life’ contest in association with Mom & Me, a one-of-a-kind store for mothers and children.

Six years back when I got married, me & hubby had our priorities clear in our mind. ‘Kids!!!...Nahh, We are not ready yet’, both of us were on the same page. Couple of years passed and we still thought the same. Other factors like home loan, achievements in career track reinforced our thought. We were happy & comfortable in a childless life. Then gradually change of mind happened though it took couple of years more.

Like a perfect project flowchart, everything started happening as per our planning. I conceived, confirmed the news by the gynecologist, informed family members and started planning for my pregnancy. But God has some other plans for us. ‘Thud’….. Our dreams crashed with my sudden miscarriage after a month. Array of mixed feelings flooded my mind in the following months. Strange void replaced that earlier contentment of childless life. I started making use of internet to fish out more information about terms like ovulation & follicular study and took particular interest in TTC forums of various pregnancy sites. I waited for those twin pink lines to appear every month with bated breath.

Finally it happened. This time we were extra cautious and rushed to doctor at slightest discomfort. My pregnancy as well as delivery procedure was smooth as hot knife passes through butter. But the real test commenced after that. Handling that 3 month old all by ourselves evolved me into a "Real Mom". Initial days were quite testing and even a continuous sleep of 4 hours was a luxury for me. I am not embarrassed to confess that many times I just felt like running away from everything to Himalayas or simply say 'I am not gonna play this game' like we used to say as kids while playing with friends.

I know it sounds really horrible feeling for a mom while ideally I should have been mushy and cuddly with my bundle of joy. But here I am jotting down the facts. After working for 6 long years I willingly took the decision to be a SAHM. Decision was tough and the change took its own time to get synced with my system. It was hard to adjust with so many changes simultaneously: soiled nappies, breast-feeding, sleepless days & nights, post delivery low phase, the emptiness which I felt after leaving my job, my health issues....list continued.

But I was able sail through all those changes & turbulent times.  I admit that sometimes I do miss those Pre-Mishti days but I really cherish my life with Mishti as well. I may not be an ideal mom but yes, I have my own criterion of being a "Real Mom". I might not fit into typical stereotyped mother figure and some of my parenting techniques even raise eyebrows of many people. 

My notions are very peculiar about parenting. I may not be a typical parent but now I realize the feeling when people say 'having a kid is like letting a part of yourself roam outside your body'. I get scared for her when I see any so called breaking news crime involving small kids. I feel superb when I see her imitating us. I feel contented when she rushes to me leaving everyone else. I love to hear her gibberish talk. I secretly feel proud whenever she achieves her behavioral & development milestones. I crib when she keeps me on my toes the whole day but pine more about the silence when she sleeps off. I freak out when she throws her ‘toddler tantrums’ but somehow feel fantastic that a new individual brimming with emotions is evolving in front of my eyes.

Actually, she has made us complete. Since her birth Mishti has gradually helped a clumsy, gawky, and klutzy girl transform into a paranoid mom who googles all day about parenting tips & tits-bits. It is because of her I started my blog (somewhat wanted to maintain a baby journal) which carted out my veiled love for writing. But altogether, now I love being a mom….yes, a ‘Real Mom’.

Our Family - Complete with Mishti

WoW - 2

‘Paradigm shift ‘can be fitted as most the appropriate term for my life. A person who was kind of workaholic or to be more precise loved to spend time in office finishing various assignments at the earliest  or just covering up for various other colleagues( who were on leaves) while handling their team members is now afraid of the word ‘going to work’ . Discussions about her second innings in professional arena after the maternity sabbatical initiates ‘anxiety pangs’ in her biological system now.

During six years of my professional life there were numerous days when I had spent almost 10-12 hours at work…and that too willingly!! I went to work even couple of days before my baby was born. No one ever assumed even when I was pregnant that I would leave my job & would be a full-time SAHM. But then I made my mind understand and took that difficult decision in my perfect senses….and believe me I am not at all repentant about it.

Initially we decided that I would leave my current job & take a break of around six months and would start searching job by March 2012. But, then my sister’s marriage got scheduled later this year. So we postponed the plan as being the only sibling my presence is quite inescapable in all the arrangements & functions…..and expecting & asking leave just after joining job is quite a turn-off for me. Throughout the whole course of discussion I remained torn between excitement to join work & anxious to leave back my baby at home.

However, I would like to admit here that somehow secretly I felt bit relaxed & happy to be able to spend more time with my kid. I hushed away all the anxiety & sloppy thoughts which hovered my mind whenever I thought about my li’l princess being alone with maid or in an alien environment of day-care. Akin to an Ostrich I denied the presence of storm by shoving my head in sand. I even dreaded to discuss this maid vs. daycare option with my spouse and slyly slipped away whenever he initiated the discussion.

But now, it seems that I can no longer avoid this scenario. Sister’s marriage would be over in November…….So I am waking up, now that September has ended.  I have to shake myself to be awake from my blissful dream to face the reality…..I cannot delay my job hunt more. This is turning out to be a tricky situation….. One part of me wants to join back the league pretty badly while the other part want to be with my kid all the time. I am not weighing any rationale behind this state of my mind……these are just pure ‘wants’ of my soul.

My mind is now taking over my heart and is waking up, now that September has ended. I have started extensive search for good daycare and a full-time maid after settling the required criteria with my hubby.  The next in pipeline is updating my resume in various job-portals. Along with all these search & researches my mind is conditioning my heart to be prepared for the forthcoming change & its twin sister turbulence. Let’s see how I am going to face it…..Kya kare Dil hai ki Maanta nahin!!!

I am so thankful to Blogadda for these topics of WoW which is helping me to blurt out my ramblings in form of blogging.

This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda

Mishti-ful Days!!!

Since last week Mishti was not well. The cold & cough relapsed this time with fever within 15 days. The cough was really bad one….poor girl, was getting so irritated with her ill health. Being an adult, we can clear our throat of mucus, but she felt irritated when too much cough ache her throat and would start crying which would end up in more cough. Generally cheerful Mishti was found whining, crying & throwing temper tantrums at the drop of hat.

Initially for two days I gave her some medicine for cold which her ped has prescribed previously, but when her condition remained same, we decided to visit her ped again. SG asked me to take her to hospital where he would join later after his office hours. Our auto ride to hospital was going smooth till Mishti decided to pat auto-drivers back & pull his hair!!! Thankfully, the distance was short… I leaped out of Auto hastily at the hospital after saying sorry to the driver.

While I was getting the appointment at the reception Mishti ran away to the Automatic sensor door at the entrance and started behaving as if she is a magician whose magic powers are making that door open & close again!!!

I had to drag her from there to the OPD. It was a big waiting area surrounded by various doctor cabins. Few things which Mishti did while making me run on my toes are:

• Tried to climb the ‘slide’ (a poly-fibred slide & some other toys were kept there to keep the ‘ill’ children engaged) from the wrong side, i.e. from the slanted side!!
• Tried to scare other kids (even who are twice her size) who came to get a ride to that slide. She scares people with her mouth wide open- tongue stuck out and making a noise ‘Haen- haen-haen’…weird na!!!
• Pushed the slide like an ice-cream cart all over the waiting area.
• Ran around the waiting area like a break less bike!!
• Fiddled with the taps of the water dispenser and deliberately touch the hot water tap and shout ‘Ooohss- Ooohss’!!
• Barged inside the dentist cabin twice & Orthopedics cabin once and then flashing her million dollar smile to the people inside those cabins. I had to catch her as if I am catching some hen and had to apologize to them.
• Climbed up the chair of nurse the moment she went away for some work. After that she pushed the  revolving chair kept there, meant for patients to that nurse’s knee really hard.  I was feeling like arrrrghhhh!!!
• Lied on the floor on her tummy many times……Did anybody mentioned any words like ‘germs or infection’??
• When she saw the sweeper mopping the floor with a large mop with a handle generally used in hospitals, she was amazed with the gadget. She followed that sweeper like the mice followed Pied Piper and went out of that waiting area leaving me behind. Again I had to get her back forcibly.

She is generally scared (??) when I roll my eyes and say ‘NO’….but that day my eyes almost popped out of socket but she gave a hoot. She only stopped her antics and started running when she saw me get up from my seat & rushing towards her.

By the time our turn came, I was exhausted and showering curses to SG who was getting late because of traffic jam. I clearly saw the sympathy for me in everybody’s eyes that were present there. A couple of people were kind enough to catch Mishti when she tried to run away from there!!

Finally, we met our doctor. He administered antibiotics & cough syrup. As soon I came out of his cabin I saw SG coming there. By that time I was gritting my teeth with anger!!

Anyway, after five days, Mishti is quite better now. I don’t know how parent of other toddlers give them medicine, because in Mishti's case it is a mess EVERYTIME. She would shout, scream, hit and spit out the medicine as soon as it is given. One person has to hold her hands & head and another person has to make her open her mouth & squeeze the medicine there.  Man…this is so tough!!!

Another behavior of Mishti about which I am bit concerned is that she has taken up this habit of hitting & slapping people when anything is done against her will. We never hit her.SG says it is the defense mechanism she has developed to stop us from giving medicine, but I am worried. ‘TerribleTwo’ is still 9 months away. Sometime, she vents out her anger & irritation like some adult by shouting & clenching her fist in air.

I banged my head in various sites regarding this violent behavior of Mishti and found it consoling to know that this is going to ‘just a phase’. But till this phase lasts, it is really angering & embarrassing.

Gosh….parenting comes along with so many hurdles!!

Mishti Unplugged - 15 months!!

Mishti is at her peak of cuteness phase now days. So, before I forget what all she does throughout the day, I think it is the high time I should jot it down. And, these post would be really cute to read once she grows up.

She can answer (identify & point with finger) few questions 90% of times successfully ( rest 10% of times just she would only clap instead of answering any questions!!) which are:

Where is the fan?

Where is the clock?

Where is your tummy?

Where is your nose?

Where is your tongue?

She recognizes lizards & refer them as ‘ThikThiki’ (actually lizard is called tiktiki in Bengali). The moment she finds any of these reptiles out on wall, she jumps around , chases them , stomps her feet and tries her best to shoo them away.

Soon she would be declared as an ‘Ant –eater Serial Killer’ by the ants’ community. She has a special liking for ants’ species and her taste buds starts itching when she sees any in sight. She has already chewed up almost 5-6 ants by now! Whenever I see her mauling any I have started saying ‘Please leave it, it is a baby, chhota bachha…leave it please’…….this trick works most of the time to stir her conscience!

At present she is trying her climbing skills all the time. So she is found practicing it with everything with a bit of height like sofa set, table, and bed, her tricycle, big grocery containers etc. However, some slight technical glitch still there which means she climbs up but parks her bums randomly and so most of the times it climbing – wrong bum parking- loud thud- loud cry- mamma picking her up and distracting to some other thing.

She loves the applause we give after she answers every question. Even she joins in for the clapping. Her Mashu has taught her a cheat question. When we say ‘Mishti, when is you birthday?’ she would point her index finger and we have to answer the question in background ‘It is on 1^st of June!!’ Now you understand why I say it is a cheat question, just because she is born on 1^st of any month, it has the easiest symbol attached to it – the index finger!

She has now started understanding simple instructions like ‘Please sit down’, ‘Give it to me’, ‘Come here’ and is able to catch keywords. She knows well for what all things I say ‘No-No’ and move my index finger. So, if she is going to do any of these things first she would look at everyone present in the room and sway her index fingers to them as if they are going to do that and proceeds to do that. Examples are, touching TV screen, pulling out plaster from damp wall, touching shoe rack, mashing the ants …..List is long.

She loves to play with anything which is not her toys. So you can find random utensils, TV remote, cushions, newspapers, shoes lying in every possible places of our house where it is not supposed to be!

She likes to go through her books, although the maximum attention span to them is still very negligible. She can point out the buffalo & pig if that particular page is open. She also raises one hand, sways it and says ‘Yaaaaaaaannnnn’ when asked ‘Elephant says…..?’ . Her book reading process is quite weird though…she holds our finger and makes it go through it and point out various pictures and with every picture we have say what it is like ‘duck’, ‘crow’, ‘horse’ etc.! She likes to read (see) the ‘Ant & Pigeon’ books herself and can identify the hunter when asked.

Her latest achievement is that when I say this question -answer: ‘What is your name, my name is Ishaani Ghosh’, she would say her last name as ‘Go’ with me & then clap-clap-clap!!

She has some previous birth relation with Salman Khan & Ranbir Kapoor….even if their slow songs are aired she is glued to TV set.

I am sure, I must be missing out so many antics of her…leaving it for another post.

Monkeying around with her cycle!!

Maa ka Dupatta Laoongi Wapas...!!!

I had already mentioned in my blog that Mishti is a great fan of music....and if it is teamed up with animation...it becomes 'Sone pe Suhaga'. I have to keep myself updated with new videos as she tend to get bored with them soon...means she would still listen and sway her body but the utility from my perspective (making her eat food!!) reduces to a large extent.

Check Out this Video(esp at 2.08 mins):

Mishti likes this video clip a lot ...giggles &  even shrieks with the crying cat in the animation. But this girl is such a copy-cat and I am quite amazed with the speed these toddlers pick up what they see & hear....So, whenever it shows that part where 'Chulbuli' clench her fist and determines to get back her mom's 'dupatta' from mischievous wind....Mishti also does the same!

Now, even if the video is not there and any of us say "Maa ka Dupatta Laoongi Wapas", she stops and clenches her fist near her waist...and it somewhat looks like Amitabh Bachhan's famous body language when he says "Hain"!!!

We are loving these antics of li'l lady so much that we are repeating that phrase often and like a pro she is also repeating her act!!...Little does she know that her own mom has only two salwar kameez which requires 'Dupatta'...and which she rarely wears, otherwise she is just comfortable in her Kurtis, tees & tops!

P.S. I am bit off blogging nowadays as I ordered & received two books from Homeshop18 recently. I found this site better than even Flipkart...actually I matched prices of few books and found Homeshop18 is far cheaper.

And yes, those two books are although not so latest but I found them interesting through Smita's book review page.

1.) Secrets & Lies

2.) Bombay Duck is a fish 

What if....!!!!

What if , my maid has not noticed Mishti dangling her legs out of staircase railings on time? My heart just shudders with the mere thought of what had happened next. I am still feeling that numbness in my thought-process.

I am feeling so guilty. I admit the responsibility of today's could-have-happened mishap lies completely on me. So, learnt the lesson by heart and would never-ever repeat my actions.

Today I had to visit my orthopaedic for regular check-up & a blood test at around 6PM. SG was supposed to come back late from work. My sis has left early for her office. In evening I got Mishti ready and send her my neighbour's place (their apartment is just opposite to ours, same lobby). Mishti likes to play with their pet dog and even the lady is quite affectionate towards her. She is a mid-aged lady with two grown-up kids. I have taken her advice in lot many matters related to parenting and found her tips always useful. Let me call her V.

As my hospital is nearby, so I thought that I should let Mishti play there, in the meantime I can come back from there and also taking her to hospital without any reason meant inviting fresh rounds of infection (last time she rolled on the floor there & licked the chairs in the waiting area!!!). I asked my neighbour and she heartily agreed. 

When I came back, I met another next-door neighbour(P) of mine in the housing complex lawn. ( We have three apartments in every lobby). She informed me hesitatingly about the incident. My maid who also works at P's house came out after finishing her work and found Mishti has climbed almost 7 stairs in the lobby and is dangerously dangling her leg outside the iron railing which is between second & third floor. Those grills have enough gap which could have caused something fatal. I can thank my stars that in few of those grills P's FIL has tied some nylon ropes as their kid is just an year older than Mishti...and those gaps are really dangerous for small kids.

My maid rushed back to P's house and called her who came out and thought Mishti sneaked out of our house. She started calling me. V suddenly came out after hearing this commotion and took Mishti back to her house apologetically. She admitted her carelessness and accepted that her attention got diverted as an important person ( some priest!!)*** came to her house and that is why even her iron grill door was half-open through which Mishti managed to sneak out!!

P repeatedly asked me not to lose my temper or react adversely while narrating the incident. Surprisingly, I did not felt any anger or grudge for my neighbour V at all. It seemed to me that my mind did not allowed me to think about what could have happened. Strange numbness engulfed my thoughts. I went to V's place and did not mentioned anything that I know about that happening. She herself told me and I did not gave any heed to the matter further. I somehow held myself responsible for all this...I should not have left my kid like that. 

And also if you are not a parent of a toddler ( or have forgotten the feeling), you cannot relate to the amount of vigilance we keep on these kids....whatever we do our one eye is fixed on them. So I am not able to blame that lady V....her attention span just shifted for hardly five minutes and Mishti managed to set out on her exploration trip!!

Anyway, lesson of the day, I am not going to leave Mishti with anybody other than few of my close people till the time she is not able to take care of herself.

Thank You GOD for being there.

*** Why the priest visited her place is an interesting story which is matter for another post...that might explain why she got distracted with his visit.

My World through my Chhotu eyes...!!!

(Shishu-Yoga)

(My way to view this complicated world!!)

Choices of life...!!

While reading a thought -provoking post by ZM, my mind pondered to my life's situation when I chose to be a SAHM after Mishti was born. It was a radical change in my life and took me long to get myself in-sync with this change.

It was a mixed bag of emotions for me. On one hand I was experiencing one of the beautiful experience of my life - motherhood while on the other hand my mind still struggling hard to tackle the array of emotions which kept flashing after my designation changed. Sometimes I fretted, some days I snapped while there were so many other instances when I felt really good about my decision.

In fact, my second post in this blog talked about this perplexed state of mine. I had the option to start working after my maternity leave by hiring maids but somehow, I was not convinced with this idea. It was hard for me. I candidly admit here that I love getting appreciation for my work. So, after enjoying being in limelight for so many years while connecting with so many people, suddenly moving to backstage was very difficult initially. I sensed that void and felt guilty of lacking motherly feelings!!

But never, ever I felt that I am 'sacrificing' my life for Mishti.How can I even think about it? Our child was planned by us only. It is not that like some mythological times a little soul came to our dreams and asked for shelter in my womb. We, in our perfect senses, brought that little soul on this earth. And obviously, we were aware that the baby would not be able to cook her own lunch & clean her soiled nappies on her own within a month of her birth!!

While ZM shared her post on FB, few people (most of them are new mommies) gave their wonderful views on this issue. One of the ladies literally echoed my thought. She mentioned how a child is parents's responsibility. I also feel the same that it is not a favour to Mishti by me to bring her in this world.An also, I am not doing any 'Big' favour by doing her chores till the time she is independent enough.I have heard many people saying to their children that how they have spend sleepless nights and slogged to nurture their kids when they were dependent for everything on their parents. That is simply weird, means boss you never asked the kid while he/she was in your womb to sign the deal that he/she has to pay-back for their upbringing.

Anyway, I digress. Coming back to my life, it was completely my choice and nobody forced me to take this decision. Regarding the negative feelings, you get those while you take various other decisions in your life, right!!. You chose to get married and later on , in some low moments you feel bad about your decision. You chose to change your job and sometime feel afterwards that previous job profile was better. It comes naturally to human nature.But the fact remains that I chose to stay back at home because I felt better if I take care of her. Mind the phrase "I felt better"!!!

I am happy now that I lived through my choice. It might be possible that I start job-hunt in near future but then again it would be my choice. I believe that every choice you opt in your life brings lot of changes and sometimes these changes cause too many ripples but beyond those waves there lies the vast sea which would make you feel great about your decision...subject to, if you have chosen the path wisely!!!

So folks, chose your path intelligently and live through your choice.

Parenting & Letting Go...

It has been almost a fortnight that I am out of touch from this blog-world...not exactly out-of-touch as I managed to sneak some time to read blogs flashing my reader but was really dormant about commenting and writing new post. Reason was primarily array of guests in my house. Anyway, all these days my blogging fingers were itching to pen down my thoughts on a topic about which I read some fabulous posts written by my favorite bloggers recently. You can read them here:

RM's post on Letting Go

Scribby's post on Parenting- Push & Pull

Although I want to write so many things about this sensitive topic of parenting but somewhere inside I feel scared & apprehensive as well. I mean I am yet to be aware of my parenting style as Mishti is only a year old. But one thing I am sure about is that my tolerance level to deal with nonsense is quite low. I am not a parenting expert and has my own doubts regarding the various shades of 'Letting Go' in parenting. I would like to quote RM's words here:

If you give too much freedom, the child becomes a brat, if you don't give freedom, the child becomes a recluse. 

Now this is something I dread of. I must admit here that I am kinda 'control freak' but in a different sense. Sometimes I do feel that I tend to influence other's thought process & decisions.....and I do this very convincingly without even offending the other person!!! So, with this trait of mine I always scare of crossing that fine line of 'giving & not giving' freedom to Mishti.

As I write about 'freedom in parenting' here, it remains incomplete if I do not mention the way I & my sis were brought up. My dad defied all our relatives & people around us with his parenting style. We were groomed from very childhood to speak our mind & perceive and experience the world outside with our own eyes. Hand-holding was minimal at our household. But it never meant that we were left alone to go haywire.Although I have to digress from the actual point but would like recall few things which are ingrained inside me.

This incident happened when I was very young (might be about 6-7 years) and I am astonished that how I still remember it. In our town, the 'kabadi wala' ( scrap-dealer) would ferry with his cart in residential by-lanes and buy the clutters from people. To make people aware of their presence they would shout at the top of the voice in a very mechanical tone .."Kabaaaadi wallllee". One day, I was found shouting in the same manner mockingly. Immediately I was called by my dad who asked me to stop that nonsense and then explained me how that person is doing it for his livelihood.....how we should not look down any profession...and how "koi kaam chhota nahin hota".

In my home, we (me & my sis) never ever vent out our anger on food. It was unimaginable for us to skip meals to blackmail parents to make them succumb to any of our demands. 

It was so nicely inculcated by my parents to not to form any opinion about something or somebody with other's version. Like many other family even they had their difference of opinion with some of the relatives but we kids, were never taught to disrespect them by painting a negative image of  theirs. We grew up and understood ourselves that who is what!

My dad has been blamed with giving too much freedom to his daughters which everybody felt would result in  a spoilt set of of 'loose sisters'. But to people's dismay we faired well than those who were kept protected and sheltered always. I am really thankful to my parents for bringing us up giving enough freedom and let us learn from our experiences.Few times I felt really bad like when I had to go all alone to the cycle-shop to get it mended or when I had stand in the long-queue of my college to deposit the fees while parents of other girls of my age did these chores themselves, but now I realise how much these small experiences helped me in developing my personality.

Anyway, coming back to the topic. I am not very sure about this 'letting go' thing....but one thing I am sure that I want Mishti to be self reliant and would try my best to help her in that. One of my friend stayed with me for few days lately with her two kids ( aged 10 years & 4 months respectively). Now this elder one was brought up in her maternal grand parent's place till she was 5 years old. This kid was the worst case of 'picky eater' I have ever seen. She took more than 1.5 hours to finish her each meal and would chew only when her mom would mix the food for her. Her mom would brag how this kid frowns if the lunch menu is normal Dal-Rice - Veggies and how she tries her best to vary the menu everyday with idlis/pasta/dosa/pav-bhaji. I know it is too early for me to comment on this situation as I am yet to experience the kids of similar age in my household. But somehow, I am not very comfortable with this situation. For me, I can prepare all these stuffs once in a while or might be in breakfast/snack but they can never be traded with proper lunch.I also found the kid munching on some chips packet just before dinner and yes she literally struggled to finish her dinner. My friend & her kid offered those chips to Mishti as well which I politely refused and found my friend make a pity face for Mishti (as if Bechaari Mishti ...she got a tyrant mom who deprives her from the tasty foods of this world!!!).

On the other hand, as I take Mishti to the housing -complex lawn in evening and let her play with other kids, sometimes she rolls on the grass..which I let her do or even some other kid of same age group try to play with her (mind it...their playing includes sudden hugging or mild pushing or pulling other's dress) , I let her play that till the time it is safe. There are many ladies who act as referee for their kids or just ferry them in lap to avoid rolly-polly on grass!! I know, I am criticized behind my back about my parenting style. While they discuss how they managed to force feed their kids I simply keep myself out of discussion as I disapprove this  force feeding and generally start eating my lunch if Mishti is creating too much fuss with her food...and believe me, 90% of times she comes back and has her food with me. They think about me as quite 'Chillax' kind of mom!! 

However, at times now I have started showing off my 'disciplinarian' avatar. Mishti has already started throwing tantrums and shrieking & crying loud to get her demands fulfilled. That day, when my friend was still at my place Mishti behaved this way. My sis took out a bottle from refrigerator and Mishti wanted that...my sis poured some water in her sipper and gave her but she started shrieking to get that bottle. My friend asked my sis to give it to her for sometime as she would get distracted soon to something else....but I intervened and kept back that bottle in refrigerator. Mishti continued howling and crying but I did not complied to her 'Zid'.

I feel that we cannot let the kid get away with their will as she is too young. We just cannot get up some day and start with our discipline regime....it has to be there from the beginning to avoid sending confusing signals to the child.

Concluding my post with some nice words by Scribby :

So, push or pull or both in balance,what you do with your child really matters in the long run and the learning starts from parents,so there!